home is where the heart is

nostalgia: a state of being homesick

i thought a lot today about  w h e r e  home is.  Visiting Matt's family on the east coast felt like  h o m e.  Being in Logan relaxing on my parent's couch felt like  h o m e.  And finally walking back into our little studio apartment in mapleton felt like  h o m e.  anywhere with matt is home.

home is where the heart is.

there's something special about the christmas season that brings out all that nostalgia. 

today we are officially home from our thanksgiving vacation and i've been playing catch up on work, to-do lists, and photography shoots.

but as i sat here writing my talk for my grandpa's funeral this coming saturday i was hit with a wave of emotion.  instead of looking at pictures of other people's beautiful families, today i took a good look at some of my own.

i saw pictures of christmases over the years with wrapping paper lying across grandma and grandpa's floor.  me braiding amy's hair as he lay sprawled out on the floor, all of us just plain old  h a p p y.
his hugs were normally right after he'd come in from doing some hard work on the farm, and you could feel the cold and smell the exhaust still from his jacket. 
i love him.
i miss him.

i loved seeing all the years fly before me on the computer screen. 

and i got choked up.

James Barrie once said,
"God gave us memories that we might have june roses in the decembers of our lives."

and oh did we make memories this trip!

 -i got called aunt lindsay for the first time.

-playing cards till we couldn't keep our eyes open.
-laughing so hard it hurt.

-sleeping next to the christmas tree.

-the cute pup rolo sneaking my thanksgiving dessert.
-walking downtown philly with josh and michelle.

-going to hershey park with grammy and papa.

-meeting vincent for the first time. 
-climbing trees.

-cuddles with nieces and nephews

-all the funny quotes.
-piggy backs.

- cutting down christmas trees.

-freezing in santa's workshop
-reading the journal matt's mom kept for him since he was born.

-seeing pictures of matt growing up and loving him even more.

-reb's "you're telling me you love me  a g a i n"  face. :)

-putting my handprint on the wall,officially a part of the family.

-our first christmas tree (we're on a budget ;)

-and matt and i created our first very own christmas tradition:  making ninja-bread cookies.  :) 

-our kids will love us ;) we hope...

in short today i am thankful for where i come from.  for those who raised and influenced me.  i'm thankful for Grandpa Jardine. i'm thankful for my sweet husband. i'm thankful for my sweet mother in law and father in law for raising my best friend. i don't know where i'd be without him. i'm thankful for my parents and siblings. i'm thankful for my new siblings, and their cute kids.  i wished we lived closer. i'm thankful for loved ones.  i'm thankful for home. 

and we'll see you there soon enough grandpa.

i will rise

earlier this week matt and i went to a CES holiday dinner for his work.  while there, we got to listen to a performance of this song.  

i haven't been able to get it out of my head all week.  

i love the lyrics.

hope it makes your day.